How from your child do you raise a leader?
How from your child do you raise a leader?
The most important thing to consider is to build your child’s self-confidence.
What is Self-confidence? Simply saying, Self-confidence is how confident you are in your ability or skills.
Before doing that you have to understand why your child has low self-confidence?
If your child is 4-6 years old and you are raising your child yourself. Take a piece of paper and write down those statements that diminish your child’s self-confidence that you say frequently to your child during the day.
These are the self-confidence damaging statements you want to avoid.
-
Endless Comparison with other children: “Look at Mary she is so smart at Math and look at Peter he is so talented, he plays the piano so well!” Or being consistently compared unfavorably to a sibling.
-
Deprecation, putting down your child. Worse yet, if you do that in front of other adults or children. “Look at yourself, you look like…” “If you will continue to be lazy you will not succeed”…
-
Overprotecting or being careless to your child. Both extremes are not good.
When your child becomes an adult, low self-confidence can manifest in a Constructive or Destructive way.
Let’s see the Constructive way, first. The percentage is very small.
In this situation, according to Alfred Adler, the hypercompensatory personality function gets activated! And this is great! 
For example, Napoleon. He was short but he compensated for his short height through his military wins. Marilyn Monroe suffered from low self-confidence and compensated through her fabulous movie roles and sexuality.
Many great achievements are built on low self-esteem and low self-confidence foundation.
From one side it can be good because those low self-confidence kids sometimes achieve great things in life and become very successful. “Look, Papa, you told me that I will not make it, that I am stupid, but looks at me, I own this huge network”. However, any major problems such as: divorce, financial crash, losing the house, business, betrail of a family member will immediately bring you to your childhood belief: “I am nobody”…
And it will take a lot more time to recover from the stress and or depression if compared with a self-confident person.
Life would be built on a constant fight, proof to himself/herself and to the parents, that “I” can make it.”
Low self-confidence can be Constructive & Destructive.
Let’s see the Destructive way. The percentage is much bigger.
Such an adult will afraid to date, afraid to ask for better pay, afraid to find a better job he/she deserves, in another word, this adult will follow his/her fears and achieve very little in their life. And the cause of the fear comes from their childhood!
If on Social Media you see the nasty comments, now you will know that people with low Self Esteem and Self Confidence will be happy to leave very negative comments.
This is their way of self-assertion over other people.
Another extreme.
People who have low self-confidence can become dictators! They feel good when they put down their wife, husband, employees, verbally and physically abusing their family members.
Look at the life of Adolf Hitler. As a child, Adolf Hitler was often sick and his mother was overly protective to him, while his father was physically and verbally abusive to Adolf Hitler. And look what we got! He became one of the world’s most terrible dictators!
Now that you learned a lot about self-confidence, I want to share with you the technics on how to build, restore self-confidence in your child.
